A few more pics from China and Thanks

I'm still sorting out pictures from our trip and ordering prints...hoping to make a China wall with some of them.  I remembered that I took our big camera out a couple of days and had some of the Great Wall and Baiyun Mtn on there, plus the garden out by our hotel....

Map of the Great Wall.  We were waiting for Flora to get our tickets.

The lift up to the top.  You ride that and then walk along the wall, climbing many, many steps!

Yep, that's a pic of Michelle Obama on this safety sign for the slide down the wall.

Us at one of the towers.  It was a beautiful day and actually got warm climbing all those steps.

No, don't do it!  Matt pretending to jump off the side.

The guy with all the photos on his camera of American celebrities who have ridden the slide.

Matt about to zoom down as fast as possible.

The top of Mt. Baiyun overlooking Guangzhou.  Wish we'd had a more clear day, but at least it was nice temperature-wise.

China throws a lot at the environment but we did see evidence of trying to be more green and it was actually a very clean place.

The garden by our hotel.  She wouldn't walk for more than a few steps without asking to be held.

Eating a leaf.

Those crazy fish.  This was before Allie tried to scoot off the edge to join them.

And finally, so many thanks go to so many of you.  You have given us kind words of encouragement from the beginning, helped us afford the adoption fees, prayed for us, been excited for us, helped with our kids, given us baby gifts, made us food, etc, etc.  Particular thanks to my mom and Matt's parents for taking great care of the kids in our absence and to all our wonderful family who cleaned our house, grocery shopped, decorated, brought gifts, and greeted us at the airport (some even driving a few hours just to see us for a few minutes).  We are blessed beyond measure to have such a support system around us and are truly grateful.  Allie is still very wary of strangers (and I think a good part of that is just her personality from what her nannies say) so we are trying to mostly stick to home and let her feel secure here, but we will see more and more of you in the days ahead and hope you'll be able to get to know her and become more a part of her life too.  We appreciate your continued prayers as we have medical appointments this week and just try to give Allie what she needs.  Thank you!

First days in NC

We came home to a different life than we left, as I knew we would and had begun to feel apprehensive about in China.  So many people say that the trip to China is about survival, but without other kids there, it didn't feel like that to me.  We had no responsibilities besides being where our guide told us to be, soaking up the culture, and caring for Allie.  Being able to focus only on her was so good for bonding and keeping stress down.  But now that we are home, Allie has gone back in her shell a bit so she needs all that attention, but we have three other kids and a home, bills, activities, etc.  Oh- and jet lag.  It has been hard.  She cries a lot, wants to be held standing up a lot, flips if she is told no, doesn't want to sleep very much, shuts down around new people (or sometimes even the kids), has jet lag herself.

But when she smiles it makes all the hard stuff seem not so bad.  And we've had many sweet moments having all the kids together.  Allie even likes Raven.  I know before too long it will seem like we've always had her and we will sleep again.  This Sunday morning it's just me and Allie and she's already showing more signs of her old self.  She's busy at work learning which surfaces magnets stick to.  She learns so quickly and has new words already- baby, doggy, bye bye.  She is doing her baby sign language and learned how to blow through a bubble wand and do a shaper sorter.  Her world is so big now and though it makes me tear up to think of all she has left behind, I'm so excited to watch her grow.  We watched Finding Dory with the older three last night and at the end when the parents show Dory how they put out a shell path to their home every day so she can find them, it really got to me as I thought about Allie's first parents and how the opposite happened to her, how they are missing out on such a sweet girl, how they must think of her every day but not have any more chances to find her.  Whew, so many emotions.  Still sorting it all out.

Coming Home

What a looong, tiring, emotional day and a half we had traveling home. Simon picked us up in his car at 5:45 to go to the airport. We were pretty quiet on the way, tired and listening to his American music. When we got to the airport, I felt very emotional thinking of taking Allie away from her home country.

Our first flight Allie was already squirmy and restless and crying. About 15 minutes into that flight I thought I was going to lose my mind and how in the world would we make it through 24 more hours of travel??  Somehow she settled a little and we made in through the 3 hour flight to Beijing, mostly thanks to snacks.

We felt so thankful our flight wasn't delayed and all the logistics of getting our 3 bags, rechecking them, going through security, and changing terminals went super smoothly even though we had a tight connection time.  Our gate was right by a play area and Allie had lots of fun during our short wait to board.  I thought it was neat to watch a little Chinese boy and girl play and try to get Allie to play and both called Allie mei mei (little sister) and referred to each other by brother or sister too.

We got on our flight to Boston and were delighted that it wasn't full and we got a row of three seats to ourselves, even though we had only paid for a lap seat for Allie.  This flight was all kinds of hard and I felt tense and tired most of it.  She was happy when we were eating and was surprisingly devoted to taking stickers off a page and sticking them in a pile like she was doing serious work for literally and hour or two of the trip.  She liked standing on my lap and using her pointer finger to make the menu on the screen move.  But other than that, it was crying, screaming, falling into a restless sleep, and repeat.  I never did fall asleep for more than a minute or two.  Thankfully the back of the plane had several restless toddlers, so I didn't feel terrible when she screamed.  Finally as we were close to landing, she fell into a deep sleep that continued throughout most of our Boston connection, which turned out to be one of the very lowest points of our trip.  

We got off the plane and went straight to a very warm customs room.  Allie was dripping in sweat, as she gets very hot when sleeping and crying, which she had done lots of.  There were two lines and although it seemed clear we needed to go in the one for American passports, I asked the guy direction folks about our adoptee and he said just go in the American lien and the lady in charge there would tell us what to do next.  So we waited in that line and went to fill out our info at a kiosk.  There was no option for Allie though, so we asked what to do and to our dismay they said we had come through the wrong line and needed to go in the one for visas.  That line was a snake of tons and tons of people that was barely moving.  My arm was shaking Allie was getting so heavy, we were both sweating, I hadn't slept in 22 or so hours, I thought we were probably going to miss our next flight, and I was certain I was going to lose my mind.  Extreme low point.

Then, a guy comes over and pulls us and two other families from the back of the line to an overflow line with only a few people.  Thank you Lord!  It still took a bit of time, but the guy was nice and even happy to tell us Allie was his first adoptee to come through his line.  We made it through that wait and into baggage claim where again we felt so thankful all our bags made it!  We loaded them on a cart and went to wait in another line.  A long one, but fast moving one.  They appeared to be checking luggage for items bought outside the US, but they rushed most of us through, just taking our luggage tags.  On to our gate, with time to spare.  But alas, our boarding passes for this flight that they gave us in Beijing were not good enough for some reason and we had to get in another line to have new ones printed.  After that?  You guessed it: another line.  A long, hot line through TSA security. 

 At this point Allie woke up and was not pleased her blanket had to go through security without her.  But we made it through and to our gate with a little time to spare, only to find out our flight was delayed for 1 1/2 hours.  So close, and yet so far.  I began to feel very emotional again, thinking of seeing all our family and finally being done with this travel.  We took turns entertaining Allie and finally it was time to board.  She immediately took her shoes and socks off to make herself at home on yet another plane.  Then she fell asleep and didn't wake till we landed.  Whew!

And then we followed the signs to baggage claim and found this happy crowd along the way!  Lots of smiles, pictures, and hugs, a few tears, a very shy and nervous Allie.  We chatted a little and got our bags, then headed home.

 

 

 
It took awhile to get the kids settled down.  They had so much to tell us and wanted to talk to Allie too.  Finally all went to bed and we got a blissful two hours of sleep before Allie was already up crying.  But hey- we did it.  We went all the way to China and came back with our precious girl.  Still processing all that has happened.  It's been quite a ride.

 

Safari Park!!

Our last full day we decided to take a trip to a big zoo.  It was an incredible place and one of the best things we did. So many animals that we could get super close to. Matt really loved the tigers, especially the cubs. I liked the pandas best. The world's first known panda triplets were born there and we got to see them wrestle. In addition to all the animals we could walk around and see, there was a train that took you to another part where you'd drive right by dozens of other kinds. Not much in the way of safety except a few fences and trenches and signs saying don't touch. Allie had a nap there in the stroller and we managed to navigate there and back on the subway just fine. We came back to the hotel and finished getting all packed to go home. We had our last dinner at a Thai place that was really good. Matt said might be his favorite meal up there with one we had in Beijing and a little French restaurant we went to one night with a very sweet waitress who spoke great English and kept telling us how nice we were to adopt.

 

 

 

The Last Days in China

February 20

We had a free day and Matt wanted to go to the shoe outlet so we rode the subway again.  It wasn't quite as crowded and people are kind and offer their seat to whichever of us has Allie.  We found the shoe place but sadly they didn't have Matt's size in any of the tons of stores.  Some kind of laughed/shouted "no" when we asked for 45.  43 was the limit.

We walked through the "toy" mall again looking for jewelry but didn't buy anything.  They have some interesting styles such as two different earrings in a set.  We rode the subway home and had naps, then Matt had to meet Simon for papers.

We played in the room and then fed the fish.  Allie wanted to eat all the crackers at first, then got into feeding them and tried to scoot into the water too.

Our last thing of the day was a river cruise.  We waited awhile for it to start and were all feeling a little blah- ready to go home, cranky.  We went inside and ate dinner, which was okay, though I again declined the chicken feet that our guide is fond of.  The city and bridges were all lit up and pretty.  The best part was going on the deck though.  The night was perfect temp-wise and the tall Canton tower was so pretty.  Then we went in for a kind of random juggling act- one Chinese woman doing her thing to Ricky Martin music.  She was good though and liked to work the audience, spinning a basketball on the kids' fingers- even Allie's.

We got home late and took a while to get Allie to sleep, then woke early for our Consulate appointment.

February 21

We had early breakfast and headed on a van with another family we had met to the consulate.  It was a morning of waiting, but nice to meet the other families.  We met one other couple who lived in Dupont the exact same years as us, in the same apartment complex.  And other dad's sister lives in a popular neighborhood in Hillsborough.

The actual business side was quick as they are just verifying all we have done so far in order to give Allie a visa to immigrate to the U.S.  She fell asleep on the way home and we took a short break and and headed to Shamian Island, which is the area on the river that used to hold adoption offices and now is mostly shops and restaurants.  The shop owners were very kind and asked a lot about our family... and definitely tried to push some sales, but I didn't mind, as I needed to get gifts and some of their proceeds benefit orphans.

Allie slept in her stroller during the first part as we walked through the beautiful old streets.  We saw several bridal and model photo shoots.  The weather was great and I could have stayed all day.  We ate a quick lunch at what Simon called "Cantonese Panda Express" and went to the hotel to pack.  Almost time to go home!

Baiyun Mountain

February 19

Today we took our first taxi to Baiyun (White Cloud) Mountain for a hike.  Allie had slept all night 8-7, so we had some energy to burn.  Tons of people like to spend Sunday here so we just followed the crowds.  Lots of music, kids playing, etc and some beautiful views of the city after you climb all the steps up (we heard 800+!)

Allie was great the whole time, riding in the front pack.  We took some pictures and let Allie walk around, then headed back down.  At the bottom we ate lunch at a Chinese restaurant where no English was spoken or on the menu- we just pointed at pictures and hoped for the best.  Got a lot of mushrooms along with our beef and cauliflower.  Allie ate everything along with us.

We decided with all the traffic, we'd prefer not to taxi home, so we started walking, hoping for a metro station.  We stopped to ask some young people but they didn't understand.  Apparently their English classes didn't include the word metro or subway.  So we just kept walking and looking for signs to show us the road so we could find it on our map.

We ended up walking the whole way back, but the weather was beautiful and a good bit of the walk was past a beautiful park with a big lake- Luhu.  When we got back, I was playing with Allie and despite only a 15 minute nap, she was so happy and interactive.  She was babbling, giggling, and even learned to sign "please" so I would open the box she was playing with.

(And a bonus pic- not from this trip, maybe not from this day?!)

Days in Guangzhou

February 17

We had our medical appointment and it was pretty quick and easy.  Lots of Chinese there who were in the process of immigration to U.S.  We went through a couple of rooms checking different things.  The doctor confirmed what we kept hearing about her rash- something she will grow out of.  It looks terrible- like a cross between measles and poison ivy.  We will have to find out more in the U.S.

After that we went to a famous area of GZ where we could see the Canton tower, the Asian games stadium, etc.  We walked around till we got hot and then went to pick up some paperwork.  Allie fell asleep so we went and finished nap time in the room, which I needed after being up since 4am with her.

Then we got brave and tried the subway.  Sooo many people but cheap (about $1 total for our ride) and easy to figure out.  We went to a wholesale "toy" market that had tons of stuff and got a few gifts, then back on the subway home.

We then went to the "Muslim Noodle House" near the hotel for lunch/dinner.  Less than $7 for all of us to eat!  Food is cheap here, but other things like clothes are expensive.  We window shopped a little  near the hotel, then got some ice cream- Haagan Daas, which Allie thought was good but super cold.

We finished the day giving her a bath in the sink.  She liked her feet in there, but was reluctant to sit till she sat on my  hand, then loved it.  She has only had sponge baths, so this was new for her.  Took some time to get her to sleep, but she only woke once briefly and slept till 7.

She really came out of her shell this day.  She walked on her own holding a hand, sat and played in the room, smiled more and looked around more.  Hardly any "koala bear".

February 18

Allie is becoming such a typical toddler now.  We went to breakfast and she was into everything on the table, trying to push away my hand and feed herself.  She will eat anything but really gets excited about the yogurt and baby food squeeze pouches.

We let her play in the room and she was okay to be left and roam around to find one of us if needed.  We went to the Chen Clan Art Museum in the late morning, which was really cool.  Such artistry in the intricate carvings that tell the 4 main stories of China in this former temple.  We got some things for Allie like a stamp with her name and scroll with her name in calligraphy.  Then we had tea with a lady who worked there.

Allie was very interested in everything and even walked around the rooms, mostly holding Matt's hand.  After that we went to the pearl and jade market and got a couple things, then out to lunch with Simon.

(Here's a few more pictures- not sure what day they're from but they're too cute not to include!)

Exploring GZ

February 16

At breakfast, Matt put Allie in a high chair and she amazingly didn't fuss at all.  She continues to eat whatever we give her.  We went to the zoo and she was pretty serious and tired.  She slept in the stroller for a good bit of it.  We saw tons of kinds of monkeys, several kinds of bears and tigers, lots of deer-like animals and birds.  We walked through a kids' park and cracked up at a tiny toddler boy riding the smallest tricycle with no pedals up a hill and free wheeling down.  So cute!

After the zoo we put her still sleeping in her stroller right in the van.  No seatbelt rules here.  Then we had lunch with Simon, which was delicious.  He even paid for it.  Then Matt went to workout and I hung out with Allie.  We went playing in front of the big mirror, which she loves, and she suddenly really opened up and started smiling, laughing, making faces, and babbling.  I couldn't believe it.  It was the girl we had seen in her videos.

Later we strolled around the city and it was so busy.  Lots of parents and grandparents picking up their kids from school, people out socializing, grandmothers playing cards and ping pong.  We saw one lady with a blue plastic double stroller with infant twins who was super friendly.  We went to eat at an Irish pub and then strolled home.

We ran into the same twin lady again and she stopped to talk to us, very animated.  We couldn't understand her except something to Matt about Baba with a thumbs up.  We thought it was funny to run into our first "friend" in Guangzhou.

Life with Allie

February 15

After a rough time getting her to bed this 2nd night (Matt was on duty), I got up with her and played/read/sang for a couple hours and got a few almost smiles.  We went to breakfast and she was looking around more and snuggling less.  We went out to the garden and saw the fish after breakfast and she actually stood and sat in the grass a little, watching kids play.  We then walked to Walmart and she was looking around a ton.

When we got back, she sat on the couch and ate a little, which was huge!  We napped together and then went with Simon to apply for her passport, which was quick and easy.  We tried to take her on a stroller ride and she did great.  Then we tried to take her in the playroom and she was getting more cranky and withdrawn.  We walked by the pool and then went to a dinner for adoptive families and hung out with the Steinrucks before they left for the States.  There was a live band and lots of kids and parents dancing.  Allie did pretty well at first, then got more snuggled into me for the rest.  But she did feed herself from my hand.

To put her to bed, I sat with her on the couch and she screamed, pushed me away, looked for Matt to rescue her, just wanted to be walked around the room.  But eventually she just laid her head down and slept.  Didn't wake till 5am and I got up and played with her and she turned the pages of books, smiled once or twice, fed herself puffs from the table, and said something: "Nahn".

Happy Adoption Day to us!

Allie woke this morning about 5:30 or 6 and fell back asleep in my arms for an hour while Matt went to work out. She cried a bit when she woke, every time I changed rooms or her diaper or clothes and then again when I handed her off to Matt. But as the morning went on, we were able to transfer her back and forth with little to no crying. We took her to breakfast and she was still and quiet the whole time, eating a bit of yogurt and congee and drinking part of a small bottle. We met a few adoptive families we had connected with online...we meaning me...which was neat. They encouraged us that a week makes a huge difference.  They were all on their second week.

 

 

We then met Simon to go do official adoption papers at the same place as yesterday. A day made a big difference here. As we sat on the same purple couch and she snuggled in to Matt quietly, I remembered her inconsolable screams from the day prior. The first step was quick. We had to get our picture made and dum, dum, dummm....Allie had to sit in a chair between us. Of course she screamed. 

Next was our first interview. A lady asked a few simple questions. Well she actually starred with a hard one- how old are you? I couldn't quite remember on too many days of little sleep!  She asked if we were satisfied with the baby and I wanted to cry to think of her being evaluated like we were car shopping or something. We love her and this is not about her having to measure up. 

 

Next we had a long wait for the other official. Our guide said he enjoys conversing for quite awhile on these interviews. We are the only ones in our agency or partner agencies that are on this schedule so we haven't been in a touring group or anything. There were the same families today as on gotcha day but all French folks so no shooting the breeze while we wait. Allie continued to wait solemnly and silently, a death grip on a book in one hand and a ball in the other. I think it makes her feel secure. We saw at the foster home that the kids carried around little chewy candies in the package and sometimes teethed on them. We gave her one yesterday from the hotel and it seemed to comfort her to just hold it. Our guide said she looks like a koala the way she snuggles up to us. Also that she looks like a farmer from Guangdong with her facial features. 😀

Finally it was our turn and our interviewer was hilarious. Big upturned grin on his face the whole time and he reminded me of a cartoon character. He was difficult to understand and had a stereotypical funny Asian accent, especially when he made a big production of trying to correctly pronounce Crabtree. Simon said he's so happy because he just came back from Chinese New Year holiday. He asked us a few questions like why do we want more kids and how will we care for Allie and why we adopted from China. All simple to answer and it went by quickly. 

 

Then we walked to a toy market area and bought some pretty Chinese New Year lanterns for $7 total. Crazy. We looked around the toy market which is like a vendor show that is 5 or so stories tall and would take hours to go through. We might go back on our own on a free day. 

We returned to the hotel and gave Allie some lunch. I think at the foster home they do all the feeding for them to save time. She doesn't really try to feed herself except yesterday afternoon slowly warmed up to getting puffs out of a snack container, which she wouldn't do today. She loved a squeeze thingy of fruit and vegetables. Sucked that thing down in about 2 minutes. So thankful she is eating because some kids won't at first. Then she fell asleep on me and has been snoozing for over two hours! (Which is why I have time to type this all out myself with one finger on my phone. Giving my secretary a little break. 😀 ) We were told she takes good naps so hope this keeps up. 

 

We don't have anything scheduled till tomorrow afternoon when we apply for a visa and then attend a buffet dinner here at the hotel for adoptive families. Not sure what we will do. Just trying to read Allie and see what she's up for. She is not your typical toddler right now. We have laid her down on the bed at times and she will just lay there, either screaming or quiet, but won't sit herself up, crawl, etc. She can walk but I did see her go limp quite a bit at the foster home when she was upset and wanted to be held. I've heard that is a learned behavior typical of kids in institutions. So for now we just hold her. Her caregiver Sean said in a message today that she will feel our love and return it soon, he is confident. The last 24 hours have been kind of like with a newborn. Lots of tears but you can mostly make the baby content enough, sometimes you have no idea how to help, nights can be hard, and you cannot wait for that first smile--the encouragement that makes it feel like it will all be okay.